Thursday, January 15, 2009

More about Elisha's birth

There was alot I did not post last time like I wanted to but I was SO exhausted and just wanted to get on for a quick moment to let everyone know Elisha had arrived. So I will post all the details now. As I had mentioned the nurse came in and checked me I was somehow at almost 10cm dialated I honestly could not believe it, nobody could, I had to get ready real fast. I started praying imediately for peace over and over again. The baby nurse came in and met with me and talked to me while we were waiting for the doctor. She was asking me about his heart defect. I told her what I thought it was, and that he should still be able to live for a bit with that. However the heart defect that he had was not the one I thought he had, when she checked what it was, she started to explain to me that he would probably pass as soon as he comes out, that he would not be able to breath and if they put him on oxygen it would probably actually make him pass faster. So I then went from thinking I had minutes to hours with him to I will probably not have any time with him...and started praying even harder for peace, I was not prepared for this. They had called the doctor right away HOWEVER there was a woman a few rooms down who was also at 10cm who also had my doctor...she was screaming like I have NEVER heard in my life. It was worse than I have even ever seen in any movie. They had said that he would come to me first but since she was screaming so he went to her first. I was so worried because I knew the longer he was in my birth canal the harder it would be on his fragile little head. Since he did not have any skull on the top it would cause his face to be very blue/purple in color. The woman down the hall was screaming and screaming, but our nurses said that was all she was doing was screaming and not pushing so they were getting no where with her, they went and got my doctor and he came to me. He came in gloved up and we all prayed together one more time, and I started to push through my contractions my contrations were far apart 4-5 minutes so I it was while, but i pushed through about 5 contractions, I could not push for one more...I was so tired I knew my last one I had to get him out so I pushed like I never knew I cold and I heard them suction him up. I told them I wanted him right away...they could clean him, measure him, and weight him later, my time with him was short and I wanted him ever minute I could. When they laid him on my chest it felt like he weighed a ton, I couldnt believe it. Alexis was onlt 8.5 ounces, so I did not know what a baby felt like that big. He had one eye open, he looked right at me. He did not take a single breath but his heart was strong when he came out. He was kicking inside me until he came out and had to take his breath on his own, then he was lifeless. I gave my son life, he lived through me, in me. What an honor it was that God chose me to carry one of his angels. My mom, mother-in-law, and loving husband was there for the delivery. The doctor and baby nurse had to leave quickly to deliver the other mother. I looked at every inch of his body...I was so proud of my son for trying and fighting so hard, and I told him that over and over again. I had my mother-in-law go get everyone who wanted to see him, the room quickly filled up. With my family and friends the baby nurse came in, got her stethascope checked his heart and he was gone, she looked at me and shook her head. While everyone was in my room, he was pronounced an angel. I grabbed him as hard as I could and cried, Donna, the baby nurse hugged me. I did not mean for everyone to be in there for that, and I felt bad. I took a few deep breaths and tried to compose myself. I wanted to give everyone a chance to see Elisha. I had felt so much love in the room, I had very loving friends and family there, and the presence of God was heavy throughout the whole time. Peace was in my heart. Everyone got a chance to hold him and give him kisses. My mom and sister-in-law Tiffany were there with us late, they did molds of his hands and feet for me. We were alone with Elisha at about 12:30am. It was all over.


  1. That must have been so difficult for you, but I am glad you were able to get keepsakes with your baby, and that he survived the birth experience so that he could get a good look at his amazing Mommma! You have again been in my thoughts and prayers all day, and I am so sorry for your loss.

  2. Shelly, it's Leslie. I have been thinking of you all day long. Knowing your heart is broken yet your spirit is strong. Knowing your son is gone yet he lives. Knowing your faith is in the God who made him yet took him. Knowing you have cried tears in private yet dried them in public. Knowing that I love you all yet hating the pain you're in... Knowing that I am glad that I know you!

  3. I have been thinking bout you all day and hoping you were ok.You and Enrique are in prayers and i am so glad your son was able to look at you for that moment and see what a wonderful mommy he had to let him have a chance at life. Stay strong and remember we are here for you

    stephs4thbaby dec board

  4. You are a light to those around you in a dark world. God has used you in a way that you probably will never be able to fathom. He is using you every time someone reads your posts.

    "Blessed are [you] who mourn, for [you] shall be comforted."

    Thank you for your example. Praise God that Elisha is with Jesus.

  5. What a heart wrenching story! You've made me cry. I'm so glad for you that you were surrounded by loving and supportive people! You know that you are loved and that you gave it your very best. Always remember that pain is a learning experience and that afterward, we are stronger for it. Empty words right now I'm sure, but you have a healthy outlook. I saw from my living room that you are now home, but don't want to bother you. I'm sure the two of you want to be alone and to comfort each other. I hope you feel well enough to go on your trip soon. A change of scenery will do you both good after such an ordeal. I know that God has a plan for you and it will be revealed when He thinks the time is right.

    Let us know if we can help in any way!

    Shirley & Derald